Hairy Xmas
 (Warning:  Irreverent Parody)

Chester’s nuts roasting on an open fire,
Jack’s frost ripping off your nose.

Your tied legs being hung by a wire,
And yolks trussed up like wrestling pros.

Every bastard knows, …

Homemade hash and ecstasy,
Help to make the seasoning bite.

Tiny snots with their eyes all aflow,
Cannot sleep from fear tonight.

They know that Satan’s on his way.
Bringing lots of tools of torture on his lai.

And every mother’s wild is going to pry.
To see if pain dear can wheelie fry.

And so I’m pilfering this simpleton’s phrase,
From kids to you and me.

Although it’s been said many times many ways …

Have yourself a hairy little Xmas.
To your farts delight.

Have yourself a hairy little Xmas … Pow!
And good night.

Same to you, … Buddy!

The Usual Christmas Cartoon

My Thanks to the Cartoonist

Copyright 2002 © Ronald W. Hull



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